Let's Get it Started....
I realized that one of the special things about the Baseball Season is that I get unfailingly excited for it to start regardless of how my team is expected to finish. I mean, in comparison to the Seahawks and Husky Basketball, the Mariners are definately the red headed stepchild. Nonetheless I can't wait to have them finish last place again. Although the odds are good that in six months the M's will encase me in a glass case of emotion, for now, optimism reigns. To the preview!!!!!!
NL West:
1) San Diego Padres: Can you believe that this team has made it to two world series?!? Is there anymore anonymous franchise in pro sports (Discounting the pathetic NHL)? Whatever, at least they have Jake Peavy, aka. the best pitcher in the National League if Roger Clemens Retires. Watch for my boy Mike Cameron making plays and dropping bombs.
2) San Francisco: One of the more underratedly dislikable teams of the decade. Brings in old, washed up geezers (Marquis Grissom, Benito Santiago) who sidle their lockers next to Barry Bonds and miraculously revive their careers, setting career highs in HR's and RBI's. Hmmmmmm. When Old Man Steve Finley drops 35 HR this year, remember you heard it here first. A write up of this team would be remiss without a shout out to Dru's boy and Ben's bro, Matt Cain, who should challenge for rookie of the year this year.
3) L.A. Dodgers: A team in flux after discracefully throwing Paul DePodesta out on his butt after one Division title and one genuine injury-plagued disaster. This year's team promises more of the same. Be dazzled as Nomar limps off the field with a Mia induced groin pull!!! Ohh and ahh as Grady Little changes pitchers twelve times in an inning!!! Giggle with glee at the collective apathy this storied franchise faces as Flavor Of the Week Town, USA, turns its whorish eyes towards the new and shiny Los Angeles Mexican Jumping Beans as they win Ninety Plus a year.
4) Arizona Diamondbacks: Although their record may get a little worse this year they are moving in the right direction. The orginazational depth has been improved by good drafts (Stephen Drew and Justin Upton) and they are the on the verge of overcoming the emotional attachments to the remnants of the '01World Series Winning Team. Expect them to be in contention by '08.
5) Colorado Rockies: The saddest franchise in all of baseball. No team has to overcome more to win games than Colorado and their pitcher eating ballpark. We'll see if Clint Barmes can come back from injury, Todd Helton rebounds from a subpar year, and countdown the starts until Jeff Francis explodes. Other than that, there's not much to see here.
NL Central
1) St. Louis Cardinals: A stern warning to all Midwestern Smalltownites everywhere; enjoy this team. It will be the last good one for a while. You've got the best player in Baseball at first base and the reigning (ahem) NL Cy Young Winner. But you've also got an aging centerfielder, a chronically injured third baseman, and opie the wonder boy at shortstop. The Cards will still win the division but the writing is on the wall. Make this one count boys, the window is closing, and your doom on the horizon, and it smells like beer and sausage.
2) Milwaukee Brewers: A team that finally got its crap together. Loaded with young talent at premium positions and blessed with one of the top five or six starters in the national league the Brewers are a serious team on the rise. Look for them to make a push at the wild card before falling short this year. Look out for the mother fing Prince as Cecil's son is going to win Rookie of the Year.
3) Pittsburgh Pirates: That's right baby. Two young studs in Zach Duke and Oliver Perez and bringing the best player north of the border in Jason Bay (the Larry Walker Memorial), the Pirates are ready to sport a .500 record or so and look to be on the rise as well.
4) Houston Astros: Set for a big let down, especally if Clemens retires. There is no offense on this team and they will have to be carried by their pitching. If Oswalt or Pettite suffer an injury, Houston fans are gonna start counting down to Reggie Bush Day.
5) Chicago Cubs: Are they perennialy underachievers or did they just overachieve in 2003? Will Prior and Wood ever be in the rotation at the same time at any point this year? Who's gonna close? No matter what happens, enjoy Derek Lee, the best non Pujols player in the NL.
6) Cincinnati Reds:Ugh. Junior's waning years deserve better. There isn't a single pitcher on this team that doesn't suck royal ass. For a fun wager with a friend, will the Yankees Offense score more runs than the Reds pitching staff allows? Loser has to shave Adam Dunn's back.
NL East
1) Atlanta Braves: The last time the Braves failed to win this division, I was ten years old, Dr. Dre was underground and Dru and Nate just finished their Freshman year at Biola. Although I don't really understand how this team is going to win the division, I've felt that way the last five years. Whatever, they're awesome.
2) NY Mets: Got in a pissing contest with the Blue Jays over who could spend the most money in the offseason. Absolutely loaded on the offensive side with Beltran, Delgado, Floyd and Wright. By the way, David Wright is absolutely stupid. He made one of the greatest catches I've ever seen last year at Safeco. If Jeter had made that catch, the entire city of New York would still be collectively orgasming.
3) Philladelphia Phillies: They have two years to do something before Pat Gillick leaves their farm system more bare than the chicks at the Pelican (Right G?). Ryan Howard is swinger of a mighty stick but their really isn't anything going on here on the pitching side of things to make me think they'll finish much better than .500. ETA for Rollins streak to end: Game 4.
4) Washington Nationals: Looking forward to seeing Ryan Zimmerman play. Supposedly this guy is the greatest defensive third baseman to come along since Brooks Robinson. There is absolutely no other reason to care about this team besides seeing if Livan Hernandez can pitch at 3 bills and to see who Jose Guillen pisses off first.
5) Florida Marlins: The slimiest ownership in the league and one of the worst fan bases. The fact that they have two world series championships in thirteen years of excistence is one of the cruelet tricks that fate could play on the league. They have predictably sold off mos of their expensive players again and are sitting something like the 29th highest payroll in the league. I hate them.
AL East:
1) Boston Red Sox: Tough call between them and NY but I trust in Theo Epstien and they had one hell of an off season. With the additions of player like Coco Crisp and Josh Beckett they are setting themselves up for some stability with Big Papi and Manny locked in for awhile. Their starting pitching is shaky, especially if Curt Schilling can't come back but since when do the Yanks have quality starting pitching. Plus I hate the Yankees. Duh.
2) NY Yankees: Their offense gets a lot of pub but with the exception of Sheffield and A-Rod you can make an argument that every other starter is either overrated or due for a downturn offensively. Posada is older and more turtle like than ever, Giambi has been wildly inconsistent, Jeter is always overrated in every way, Damon is old and on the downturn, and Matsui gets mad props for his RBI's. Of course I would drive in 65 runs a year if there were runner on second and third every time I came to bat. Pitching wise, other than Riviera every spot is a question mark. They very well may score 1000 runs and win the World Series but I could just as easily see them finishing third and missing the playoffs. You should pray to God it's the latter.
3) Toronto Blue Jays: Why is it you hear so often about the competitive disadvantage that so many teams in baseball are in but then a "small market" team like Toronto rises from nowhere and splurges and new shiny toys to the tune of 100 million bucks? If Burnett is healthy he gives them a good second tier starter behind Roy Halladay, an absolute stud and probably the best starter in the AL right now. Offensively, look for my boy Vernon Wells. They may have a shot at sneaking into the wild card, but if they don't they can't blame the gigantic payrolls of New York and Boston anymore. It just so happens that those teams not only spend their money in loads, but they spend it wisely.
4) Tampa Bay Devil Rays: I might be tempted to pick these guys in second if they were in the AL Central, they have a ton of young talent in Rocco Baldelli, Jorge Cantu, B.J Upton, Carl Crawford and Scott Kazmir. They all pale in comparison to Delmon Young though. If this kid gets 400 ab's this year he WILL win AL Rookie of the Year. They're on the right track with Joe Madden, who was the Parliment behind Mike Scoiscia's puppet Japanese Emporor the last couple of years in Anaheim and a new owner who isn't the biggest jerk owner in America.
5) Baltimore Orioles: Of all the team's that suck right now this one makes me the happiest. They completely bastardized themselves last year by signing Palmero and trading for Sammy Sosa and then had to watch as it completely blew up in their faces. Now Miguel Tejada wants out because they aren't good. Hey jackass!! Stay in Oakland!!!!
AL Central
1) Cleveland Indians: If I'm being objective and discount my love for the M's than this is my favorite franchise of the past fifteen years. Built a power in the nineties with almost completely homegrown talent in Lofton, Thome, Ramirez, Albert Belle. Recognized when that window was closing and didn't cripple themselves by resigning them to massive contracts when they became free agents, traded players when they were at their highest trade value, suffered threw a couple down years and now have another great team on their hands consisting almost entirely of products fo the farm system. Players like Johnny Estrada, Victor Martinez, Travis Hafner, C.C. Sabathia, Cliff Lee, Grady Sizemore and others make this team a threat to dominate the division for years to come. Be glad you squeeked it out last year White Sox, your time is past.
2) Chicago White Sox: A Successful title defense depends on the ability of Jose Contrares ot continue what he did last year and for Jon Garland not to regress to the mean. They are going to be a good team again, but the career years turned in by practically the entire pitching staff is going to be tough to repeat. Offensively the "loss" of Carl Everett is probably the best thing that could have happened to them. Thome will be good but not great. Scott Podsednick is wildly overrated, but that's a subject for a different time.
3) Minnisota Twins: Why do I love all these scrappy midwest teams so much? They're in a tough division but if Joe Mauer and Justin Morneau bust out like they can they will have an outstanding pitching staff with Santana, Radke and a young left-hander named Fransisco Liriano, who has been called Santana, part deaux. A playoff contender if the pieces fall in place, but they need the offense to produce.
4) Detriot Tigers: Another classic example of a team that isn't so much financially at a disadvantage as it is incredibly stupid with its money. Imagine all the talent that a smart and shrewd GM can buy with $100 Million in contracts. Instead the Tigers bought two over the hill injury risks in Magglio Ordonez and Troy Percival. Thanks to those two decisions they should be sufficently irrelavent for the rest of the decade. Well done.
5) Kansas City Royals: With the uprising of the downtrodden in the NL Central no other division has a pair of punching bags like Kansas City and Detroit. The Royals are appearing the be more and more a hopeless case. They have a great location in a great sports town (that's for you Elbrecht), but incompetent ownership and the inability to keep what little talent they produce (Carlos Beltran and Johnny Damon) is castrating. With the sudden loss of Zack Grienke, their best pitcher, they should able to challenge the '03 Tigers and '60 Mets for the worst record ever.
AL West
1) Oakland Athletics: If the AL West was the movie A Knight's Tale than the A's would be plucky Heath Ledger following his feet and "changing the stars" as they slay the aristocratict and arrogant Mariners year after damn year. Billy Beane would even fit as the sharp witted and honey tounged Goeffrey Chaucer and Bobby Kielty could be the funny looking red head. Eric Chavez could be the modestly attractive chick blacksmith. God I hate this team and I hate that I root for the bad guy.
2) Los Angeles Buena Park "909" Anaheim OC Angels: Even with all of the historical atrocities of the NY Yankees the Angels are hot on their heels as the most genuinely dislikable team in the game. The combination of Disney feel good, name changing, incredibly innane fan base and moronic orginizational beliefs like Garrett Anderson is still good and Darin Erstad is useful at first base are almost as frustrating as the fact that they have arguably the best and easily the most entertaining player in baseball in Vlad the Impaler and that they have one of the most loaded farm systems in baseball. The only thing that will keep them out of the playoff chase is if Bartolo Colon pulls the fat in one of his chins.
3) Texas Rangers: Had a great offseason and seem to be finally abe to put the God awefulness of the Arod induced crapulence behind them. Quality additions like Brad Wilkerson round out an already studly offense which means that it will all ride on a brand new starting five. A quality team in the deepest division in baseball.
4) Seattle Mariners: No team outside of the Yankees an Red Sox has more to work with when it comes to resources than the Seattle Mariners. They are one of the most profitable teams in baseball year after year due to their Stadium, rabid fan base and isolated location app. 700 miles from the nearest competition. So why have they sucked ass the last two years? Orginizational failiure at every level. Player evaluation, ability to keep a stable full of pitching prospects healthy, holding onto sentimental favorites like Bret Boone and Dan Wilson past their prime, and an inability or unwillingness to make the key acquision leave this team further from the World Series than it has been in 13 years. Fortunately, hope is on the horizon. His name is Felix Hernandez. If he gets enough innings he'll be in the top three starters in the AL this year. By the way, he's 19!!!!!!!!!! A group of promising young players like Yunieksy Betancourt, Jose Lopez and Jeremy Reed coupled with prime players Richie Sexson, Adrian Beltre and Ichiro! mean that this team has finally gotten over its emotional attachment to the famous '95 team and is headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, the hill is steep and long.
AL MVP: Alex Rodriguez
AL Cy Young: Roy Halladay
AL Rookie of the Year: Delmon Young
AL Wild Card: Chicago White Sox
NL MVP: Albert Pujols
NL Cy Young: Jake Peavy
NL Rookie of the Year: Prince Fielder
NL Wild Card: NY Mets
ALCS: Oakland Vs. Ceveland
NLCS: Atlanta Vs. St. Louis
World Series: Oakland Vs. St. Louis
Winner: Oakland A's
posted by Nate B @ 4:17 PM
3 comments
3 Comments:
if we had a Unknown Hall of Fame... this post goes in... hands down. F the waiting period. i move for immediate induction. and not just because my A's got the nod and Matty C got the obligatory photo upload at the end.
outstanding.
I think the reason that the Tigers are going to suck and suck for a while is the fact that they released our boy Matty P this week. F YOU TIGERS!!!
but on the other hand.. great post. I learned a lot!
By the way, as I watch the sentimental montage fo rthe White Sox on ESPN I cannot get over this whole "The long suffering Chicago fans blah blah blah" which is the same thing I had to hear for the Red Sox the year before. I know I've said this before but neither of those cities know jack shit about sports pain. Chicago has the Bulls, and Boston has the Celtics, Patriots and if your stupid and like hockey, the Bruins. Try being a Seattle sports fan, where either your team sucks, is slightly above average and harmless, or so good that only way they don't win the championship is a royal screw job by the powers that be!!! But it's cool, we're in the Northwest, we don't have feelings, don't pay attention to us. We'll be fine. By the way all of your Windows based computers will self-destruct in 3...2....1...
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