Pennant Race Breakdown
There are two things that I am good at: 1) talking inappropriately and 2) talking about baseball. So I thought why not mix the two and give a little break down of the extremely close playoffs races that are happening right before our very eyes.
I will start with weaker league (only 8 hitters in the lineup, excluding my boy dontrelle willis) and the Weakest division in the history of baseball.
NL West: Are you friggin kidding me with this crap?! the OC expos would win this division. If a team could stop playing they would win, because their loss column would not continue to swell like R. Kelly at Toys R US. The Padres should win this division, I hope. If the return of Bonds causes the GAY ASS giants to come back and make the playoffs I will no longer be a baseball fan.. well at least until next year, but I will be pissed.
NL Central: This is a pretty good division, the cardinals are the best team in baseball, yes I said it. maybe not right now, but over all they are. Albert POO-Hole is/ will be the best hitter in the history of baseball. If their pitching is there, they will dominate. Houston might win the wild card (wild card race is crazing this year by the way, and I dont feel like breaking that down) and they might have to play their last games in a minor league park, because of the freaking hurricane. (p.s. are you friggin kidding with all they hurricanes, gosh dangit!)
NL East: The braves will win their 3523 straight division title and the nationals will be wondering, what if? The nationals had a great first half and a decent second half, I do have to admit they were impressive this year. Eventhough Guillen is a complete douche-licker and Frank Robinson enjoys the sexual contact of other males. I do like the marlins, not because they will win but because they are good. Dontrelle willis, this guys rules! he hit 7th in the lineup the other day. oh and did I mention he has 22 wins. yeah 22, when bartolo colon won his 20 everyone in southern california offered to service him, meanwhile 2 pitchers have already done it.. This year! eventhough they only face 8 hitters each night they still won 20 games, but every angel fan thinks bartolo is the first in the history of the game.
AL West: The angels will win it. they have won 7th straight and they go into oakland this next week. The A's are my favorite team in the west this year because they still win with the average age of 6 years and 57 days. But the angels need production from all of their caribbean players and they cannot have them swinging at slop.
AL central: This might the the biggest case of crapping the bed in the history of the game. The Indians, oh sorry, the Native Americans, are good right now and if they make the playoffs (very likely) they will win it all. They have it all right now. The white sox deserve to lose. Ozzie Guillen is a complete dunch sucker and he needs to learn how to manage and not be everyone's best friend. Oh I heard he throws up after each loss. What an Alpha girl.
AL East: Yankees will win! you want to know why? They are the F-ing YANKEES! that is why.
That is my little breakdown and a little longer post for you all to enjoy. play with it and let me know what you think.
posted by Garrett @ 8:11 AM
1 comments
1 Comments:
Nicely done the G. I must say that my dream 4 in the AL of Athletics, White Sox, Indians and Bosox now appears to be about as likely as a Willie Bloomquist bombsky. I'll get your back and do a wild card breakdown this afternoon. And tell Artie I said to fuck off. As well as everyone else that goes to those god forsaken games.
Post a Comment
<< Home